Creativity Blocks

Round about December 2012 it happened to me. Suddenly I was dropped from the jet steam of creative muse.

Left with just my ordinary dull mind the world seemed to have lost its luster.  Things I never had time nor interest in filled the gap. I started listening to NPR, main stream media and TV.  Shrill, shocking news and events since I last surfed the main stream wave. Yet somehow nothing had really changed. A whirlwind of smoke and mirrors revealing nothing of importance to me but it filled in time.

I blame it on hormones, stars, sun and moon. Lack of vitamin D, E and C.

I remembered a bit of wisdom I picked up from somewhere. Show gratitude and or wonder in the most ordinary of things. It started to work. I looked at the world with fresh eyes. Even cityscapes of concrete, metal and decay held some treasure.

Glistening rain drops sparkling on a car hood.

The soft fur on my cats ears.

Pink buds emerging on bushes and trees.

Cracks and crevices of broken concrete creating patterns like beautiful mandala’s.

City parks showing their wonder.

Ever so slowly sparks and wisps of smoke from the eternal creative consciousness started to enter my awareness.

I don’t feel entirely back but enough energy came thru to inspire a video I call “New City”.

What do you think?

 

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Sadness

Sadness

I have been skipping around on topics on this blog.  I sit at my computer and let what comes… be my topic.

This blog is back to Animal Communication.  Recently on one of my Animal Communication calls a most profound experience in many ways happened.

On that call our class got the sacred opportunity of talking to a large white dog with a different sort of message.

As I tuned into this majestic animal I’ll call Henry I got a sense of light and expansion.  It was as if he was larger than life.  If you met him in real life you would think he was bigger than he was.  I was feeling this expansion when all of a sudden it started to shrink and shrink and turned into the most profound, vast, aching sadness.

My heart chakra was deeply affected and tears came to my eyes.  Since the change was so sudden and unexpected I wasn’t sure what to do.  I just took it in.

I asked Henry what was wrong.  I didn’t get an answer but a burst of deeper sorrow came through.  It didn’t feel right to ask him anything more.  I just stayed with him.

The other students picked up on this sadness too.  It was the theme of the call. Henry was a rescue dog and the owner didn’t know what his history was that could have caused such sadness.

I have felt similar sadness with clients when I have done energy work but I have to say this was different.  Also to know that an animal, a beloved pet can hold such sorrow is truly heart breaking.

Animals do and feel so much more than we may ever know.  I’m in awe of these majestic beings living with us.

A special thanks to Henry’s owner for knowing and appreciating what a special dog she has but most of all a very special thanks to Henry for his willingness and trust to share his feelings with us.  I feel that I can say he touched all of us and took us all to a new level of understanding and insight.

Passing…

I was staying at my sister’s apartment when our Mom called us with the bad news.  Dad had a heart attack and they were rushing him to the hospital.  Mom was on her way and we were to meet her there.

It was early morning and I was still in my pajamas.  I went into the bathroom to dress and get ready to go.  As I was dressing I felt my Dad floating above me and he was smiling and conveying loving thoughts.  I knew he had died but didn’t say anything to my sister.  The drive to the hospital was silent, both of us lost in our thoughts.

At the hospital we were led into a room where my Mom was waiting for us with my younger sister.  My Mom embraced us and choking with emotion said Dad was dead on arrival.

I think since I already knew this information, it was hard to hear but not devastating.  I knew his essence was free and happy released from the physical plane.

To this day I haven’t shared this with my family… untill now.

It is so comforting to know we are eternal beings only experiencing physical reality for a short period.

Fire…

Fire!

Inexplicably I was suddenly overly concerned about fire.  I became concerned that my house was going to catch on fire or fire would adversely affect someone close to me.  I checked and double checked heaters and appliances.  Several times I started off for work only to return home and check them once again.  It was literally a hand wringing feeling.

What was going on?  Fire would drift into my thoughts at odd times.  I was just starting to take a walk with a friend and when suddenly very clearly I heard “Fire” as if someone was whispering in my ear.- clearaudience.

At this time in my life I was getting deeper and deeper into the study of metaphysics and was working with a gifted Shaman.  I decided to bring this up at one of our sessions.

“I keep thinking about fire and double checking my heaters and appliances”.  I said.

After establishing that I had no fire trauma in my present or known past we proceeded.

“Go into the feeling”.  The Shaman said.

As she said this I shut my eyes and a scene started to develop in my mind’s eye.  The feeling was fearful and agitating.  I saw a huge pile of wood ready to be lit.  It was night-time and people were surrounding and milling around the massive pile of wood.  There was anticipating of if being lit.  I knew someone was going to be  burned at the stake.  Then abruptly I know who… it was to be my mother.  I was overcome with grief.  A man dressed in ragged burlap textured clothes forced me to look at him.  He had piercing blue eyes full of power and dominance.  It was my Dad, he wanted to make sure I knew that he was behind this terrible event.

My Mom in that lifetime was the village herbalist / healer and held a lot of sway with the villagers.  The problem was her husband, my Dad didn’t like this.  He was jealous, controlling and found a way to put an end to it.

The fire was lit and the flickering light, fear and village people’s gruesome anticipating popped me back into the present moment.  I couldn’t bear to see or feel anything more.

I looked up.  The Shaman was still observing I could tell.  Her eyes were shut but her eyeballs were moving behind her eyelids. After a bit she too came back.

We sat in silence for a while.  I now knew where my concern of fire had come from.  As I had been working on myself, a deep old fear surfaced ready to be released.

“Good work”.  The Shaman said.

After that session I was no longer troubled by thoughts of fire…

Animal Talk – Strawberry Picker

Strawberries

Growing up in a rural area provided at least one unique teenage job opportunity as opposed to a summer jobs in the city. For my little town it was strawberry picking.

One summer my goal was to earn enough to buy a new Raleigh 10-speed bike.  Back then 10-speed bikes were all the rage.  I wanted one so bad I even bought and put together a model 10-speed bike so I could at least have a little one until I could afford to buy a real one.

My friend Julie and her younger sister received new bikes recently and I was keen to have my own.  Julie’s new bike was a classic girl’s bike and was stable enough for her to be able to ride it with no hands.  It was quite a sight to see her riding on the country roads with her arms crossed pedaling away.  Her sister’s bike was a 10-speed and that was what I coveted.

This particular summer I signed up to be a strawberry picker with my two older sisters. We had to get up at 6:00am in order to arrive at the fields at 7:00am sharp.  Getting to and from the fields was a half hour walk for us, each way. It made for a very long tiring day.

You may not know this but strawberry picking is very hard, back breaking, work.  You spend the entire day on your hands and knees pushing a big tray holding 12 pint size containers that your job was to fill up.  You couldn’t always see the berries and you had to send your hand in the leafy plants blind.  This meant more times than not your hand would encounter families of big and small slimy slugs. Oftentimes the rows were wet mud or had standing water in them and you just had to plow right through the mud and water.  At the end of the day your clothes, especially your jeans were coated with mud.

Luck was having a row of big fat strawberries as these filled up the individual
containers the fastest.  Otherwise it took twice as long to fill up the trays with small or medium sized berries. We were paid the princely sum of 75 cents per tray so the more trays you finished the more you earned.

Some kids tried to cheat by putting rotten or bad strawberries on the bottom of the containers but more often or not they were caught and sent back to the field with their tail between their legs.  I have to admit I tried it once or twice but I cleverly only put 1 or 2 in a container so it was harder to find.  But I felt too guilty and nervous about doing it so I just ended up playing by the rules. Fortunately I didn’t like berries of any kind so I didn’t eat away my profits either, like some kids did.

The lady who checked our trays always brought a radio and played it loud for all to enjoy.  It always caused a stir when the song “Strawberry Fields” by the Beatles came on the radio.  It was like a special song just for us.

That summer I earned a grand total of $67.50.  That works out to filling 90 trays or 1080 individual pint size containers at .0625 ea.

It was a lot of money for a teenager back then but not enough to buy the made in USA, Raleigh 10-speed bike I wanted. I had to settle for a cheaper brand I never heard of which was made in China.

This was in the mid 70’s, little did I know how pervasive made in China was going to become and that many years later I would be sent to China by my employer.  But that is another story…

So next time you eat a beautiful juicy strawberry consider giving a special silent thanks to all those hard working strawberry pickers out there.

Animal Talk – On the Farm II

On the Farm

Living in a rural area and on a farm things happen that fall under the category of “you just can’t make this stuff up”.  I will just share a few tidbits…

Waking up to the neighbor’s herd of dairy cattle in our front yard. You know what they say – “the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence” .  Well it’s true for some people and some animals.

The cat that celebrated Thanksgiving Day by killing and eating one of the baby turkeys.

Under the category of unfortunate accidents, one of our roosters met his demise by getting his head caught in a cement block.   Sometimes you just have to let the bug get away…

The duck that thought it was a chicken.  Truth be told, we had put the duck egg in with the other chicken eggs, so it hatched with all the other chicks.  But it just goes to show you how much influence your environment can be…

Our dog showing up with a face full of porcupine needles… not once but twice. Now that’s a painful way to learn…